Gulliver’s Truth – Part I
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They were in the car on the way back to the house where January lived with her parents and with every mile, Gulliver’s stomach twisted and heart pounded. Taking them home meant distance between them and he wasn’t sure he could stomach the space.
His daughter was breathtaking. Every single bit of the chaotic energy she brought resounded in him like a siren song. He was drawn to her like she was a beacon. Even now as she sat between her parents, she was singing a song along with the radio at the top of her lungs. At first he’d been alarmed at the fact she knew the lyrics to the pop music because some of them were quite risqué, but he soon realized the child for the most part had no idea what she was singing. She was simply grooving to the music.
She couldn’t sit still. Her feet had caught his leg more than once as she swung them from her booster seat. Right now, she was singing at the top of her lungs to a song about a manchild and her arms were flailing dramatically as she punctuated every note. He met January’s eyes over the top of the child’s head and saw her grinning at the behavior.
“She’s very animated when she’s singing.”
“Which is why I’m certain the letter in her bag at the use 2:32 referring to her singing Good Luck Babe is probably deserved.”
Gulliver’s Truth – Part I
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He felt a pang in his chest as January suddenly seemed to remember she hated his guts, her smile faded and she turned back towards the window, preferring to stare at the passing scenery than to engage with him.
He deserved it. With ever conversation he was having with her, the deeper his regret rang. He was exhausted, physically and mentally. It had never dawned on him, even for a minute that she’d overheard the conversation between him and Thisbe the day she disappeared. It wasn’t until last night, in the quiet of his room, with the silence weighing heavy on him, that he was able to replay that conversation in his head and imagine what it would have been like for her to hear it. He could see it in his mind, the way her heart probably shattered in real time. He’d destroyed everything while trying to live a double life.
All along, he’d believed their love was so powerful that the moment they reconnected, she would remember he was her soulmate, fling herself into his arms and they would be together forever. Instead, the reality was brutal, cold, and stinging. He was delivered a version of the truth for which he’d been completely unprepared. It hurt. He couldn’t deny it. It hurt so much to know she hated him with the same intensity
that he loved her.
When he’d texted his brother at two in the morning, the weight of his mistakes squeezing his lungs, his brother had called him immediately. After hearing the entire story, Glenn had been
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Gulliver’s Truth – Part I
blunt.
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“Be grateful she’s letting you near Kaylee at all because if I’d have been in her shoes with Mitsos, I’m not sure I’d let you around her. She knew nothing of our world, no understanding of what it means, what we are, who we are. Her understanding of crime families is based on movies and her uncle’s relationship with a dirty federal agent. She did what was best for her and her child, and I do not fault her for this. You don’t deserve her right now.”
“Then what do I do?”
“Become the man who does.”
His brother’s words were still resonating with him now.
It was his mistakes which caused this situation. He needed to
do better. Later, when Kaylee was asleep, he would sit January and her parents down and give them the truth they deserved. Hopefully, it didn’t make his wife run for the hills.
His wife. It didn’t matter to him an ounce that a piece of paper making it legal didn’t exist. He meant what he’d told her yesterday. When he recited those vows, he meant them with every fiber of his being. There would never be anyone else. While she did not consider him her husband, and the thought made him rub his chest absent mindedly, in his heart, she was his wife.
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Gulliver’s Truth – Part I
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However, he needed to win her over. He needed to be the man she deserved.
It was going to kill him to watch her go on dates, but Glenn told him to offer to babysit when she did. It would be a good distraction to be with Kaylee, and it would tell January he was being a supportive coparent and partner. He also knew if she thought even once about Kaylee while she was out on said dates, then she would think of where Kaylee was, and he would be on her mind.
Kaylee’s arms swung and he ducked, and he realized while he was lost in his thoughts, his daughter had switched songs. She was singing a song with gusto, her entire body swinging about a pink pony. He’d never heard the song before but as he listened to her belting it out, he looked at January wide–eyed and reached out to tap her shoulder.
“Is this a song about strippers?” he mouthed the question at
her.
“No. It’s a gay anthem.” She whispered back.
He blinked at the comment and then he shook his head. Being the father to a little girl was going to be full of surprises for him. The thought sobered him again. He was a father, and he’d missed so much already. Glenn made it clear to him last night
he had no right to be upset with January over what he’d lost:32
Gulliver’s Truth – Part I
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What he needed to do was make the best of what he was given and aim for a better future.
