A Father’s Regret Part I
January waited for Gulliver’s answer.
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“January, I would hate it if you fell in love with someone else and wanted to build a life with them. It would destroy me inside but and I say this with all the reluctance in the world because I don’t want you to take it as me saying I am okay with it because I would not be, any man that you decide is worthy to be your partner and will be part of Kaylee’s life, is safe under my protection. Just know that I won’t be letting you bring someone into the family who is a risk. I will vet the people you date the same way I now vet anyone Thisbe dates.” He took a deep breath, “but, and I mean this exactly how it sounds, if someone does anything which causes harm to you or our daughter, they die. Full stop. It will make what I did to Thisbe’s rapist look like a child did it instead of a man very experienced in his craft.”
Terrance cleared his throat, “Davis said your nickname is Prince of Pain and you’re wanted for at least twenty hits all over the world.”
Gulliver gave a tilt of his head and a shrug which spoke to carelessness, “Prince of Pain is a nickname one of my grandfather’s buddies gave to me when I was kid. Believe it or not, it’s not because I inflict pain but rather how much I can take.”
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A Father’s Regret Part I
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“What do you mean?” January looked at him curiously.
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“When I was much younger, in my late teens, I was picked up by one of my grandfather’s enemies. They wanted some information on a shipment my grandfather was expecting. I was quite uncooperative despite their interrogation techniques. When my grandfather and his friends arrived to bring me home, they overheard me egging my captors on and telling one of the men that my sister punched harder.”
“They hurt you?” January hated how her stomach flopped over at the notion he’d been in danger.
“It is not the first time and won’t be the last I’ve been in a fight, January. I can take it.”
“If you, as the prince get taken, then how can you keep us safe?” she countered worriedly.
“January, each and every single time I have been taken, have been hurt or have been involved in an altercation, I have skirted security protocol or avoided it outright.”
“Why?”
“Usually, it’s my arrogance or my pride. The time I was captured as a teen I was boldly showing off to a girl who happened to be affiliated with my grandfather’s enemies. I was 275
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a cocky prick thinking I was going to woo her with being the
A Father’s Regret Part I
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bad boy from the other side of the tracks. Another time, I was stabbed in the shoulder after Glenn specifically ordered. me to stand down and I got in a man’s face, and he pulled a knife and got me. I will say, what he did to me, I did to him a hundred–fold.”
“Lovely,” January rolled her eyes.
“Just saying. He got one hit in. I decimated him. So long as you and your family obey the rules of security and frankly, I’m going to presume you’re not going to, so I have additional protocols in place already, you’re safe. There will be none of my cockiness in thinking I have something handled when it comes to you and your family. There will be none of my ego or hubris in dealing with your safety.”
“You’re sure?”
“A hundred percent.” He reached across the table and took her folded hands in his. “I know you don’t trust me. I understand why you don’t. I lied to you. I hurt you. I caused you heartache which I cannot begin to comprehend. I am sorry, January. Incredibly sorry. Yesterday I was more focused on the way my feelings were hurt because you didn’t leap into my arms at the sight of me than listening to the words you were saying. When you gave me shit before you went to bed last night, it hit me right here,” he tapped his chest with two fingers, “that I was looking at this with my ego and not from the place of your 3/5 hurt.”
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A Father’s Regret Part I
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“You put her through hell,” Analia accused with a cold tone to
her voice.
“I put all of you through hell, though admittedly January suffered most.” He exhaled sharply, “I am sorry to all of you, all four of you, for my betrayal, my lies, my arrogance at thinking I was right. My lies and my actions caused you all deep hurt and I am apologetic. The thing I regret most is that my actions, my behavior cost me to lose seven years with my daughter.” He looked at January, “last night you said to me how you don’t regret running or keeping her safe from me because you were doing what you thought was best and I won’t lie to you,” he swallowed loudly, “I was angry for a moment that you said it. I tossed back a couple of whiskeys and let the words you said simmer and it dawned on me; it’s not your regret to have. It wasn’t your actions which robbed me of my chance to be with my daughter. They were my actions, my choices and my decisions which forced you to make a decision which created this situation. You have no reason to regret, January but I have all the reasons in the world.” His eyes. watered as he added a second hand to the one holding hers, “I apologize to you,” he looked at Terrance and Analia, “and to you both not only for my behavior all those years ago but also for yesterday. I came in here thinking Kaylee and the fact January hid her from me was a bargaining chip to make my wife come back to me, like it made us even. I fucked her over back then and she fucked me over by hiding my child, so we were
on level playing fields. I was wrong. She,” his gaze flitted
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A Father’s Regret Part I
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to the kitchen door where the little girl had earlier run through, “is not a pawn. This is not a game where we keep tally. There is no winner or loser. A night of contemplation and some choice words from you January and from my brother Glenn, have put a lot into perspective. I will do better. I promise.”
