Chapter 60
Chapter 60
Cassidy
Eight years ago…
“CARTER,” I WHISPERED, forcing back tears. “I have to go.”
“Why, Cass?” he demanded.
I stared up at my best friend and tried not to fold. “You’re leaving-”
“I’ll be back in less than a year.”
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Carter had driven to my place, rather than heading home after work, and he now stood in my kitchen (after sneaking in through my bedroom window), his face contorted in frustration as I tried to explain in person what I’d tried to explain over the phone. My parents were still at work and my sisters were out with their boyfriends, so I had the house to myself… which almost never happened.
“But if you’re not here, there’s no reason for me to stick around.” I smiled. “Who knows where the Air Force will take you?”
He shook his head and ran his hands through his hair. “Damn it, Cass. I don’t get this need you have to run.”
I raised an eyebrow. “You’ve known me since I was six. I have always wanted to run.”
Carter Quinn had been my constant shadow ever since my parents moved me and my sisters to the property adjacent to the Quinn farm eleven years ago. It had started on my first day of first grade when he put a cockroach in my hair and I calmly removed it and named it “George.” He was two years older than me, but ever since then, we’d spent pretty much every day together trekking through the wooded areas around our homes and lazy water “rides” on what he called the Quinn River. Of course, it was more of a pond, but it was safe to swim in and sometimes we would all take turns pushing each other in inner tubes in order to feel like we were all on some kind of rapids adventure. Silly kid stuff that I was going to miss.
“That’s not what I meant,” he grumbled.
“I know, buddy.” I sighed, trying once again to bolster my resolve.
Carter was the fifth of six brothers, all rambunctious little boys who grew up to be gorgeous, strong, respectful men. They loved their Mama, and had a deep reverence for women in general, but that didn’t mean they didn’t take advantage of the fact they were all illegally good–looking.
“I can’t believe you’re giving up your senior year.”
“To dance in France, Carter!” I said for the umpteenth time.
“You could dance in good old America,” he said, also for the umpteenth time. “What if you hate Paris and I’m not here to help you pack up and come home?”
“You leave in a week.” I rolled my eyes. “You won’t be back for at least eight months, probably longer, and then that’ll be for what, a week or two? Then onto something else for another year or more, right? I’ll do my year in
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Chapter 60
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Paris and beat you back here either way. It’s the perfect chance for me to finish school and train with a prestigious ballet company… and take my mind off the fact that you’re going to be flying planes into combat. It’s a win–win.”
He knew how much I hated school. I was never good with the politics of high school and once he left, I was bored… and a target.
“Are you still dealing with assholes?”
“Not since you forced your brother to stick close to me,” I said with a sigh.
“I didn’t force him to do anything. You know he thinks of you like the sister he never had.”
I chuckled. “Or wanted.”
Carter grinned. “Aidan adores you. Just don’t let him know I told you.”
Aidan was the baby of the family and one year younger than me, but you’d never know to look at him. He was six–foot–one and still growing, his best class was weight training, and, as was common with the Quinn brothers, he had a harem of girls who followed him everywhere.
Once Carter graduated and I was left without my “shield,” Aidan took up the mantle and his harem didn’t like it, but I tried to keep my head down and ignore them as best I could. Easy to do for the most part since I was dancing more than going to classes my junior year.
“My lips are sealed.” I tried for a goofy grin. “This isn’t a problem that you can make your bitch, buddy. We’re just going to have to let it all play out naturally.”
Carter crossed his arms and studied me. “If you go, I’m gonna miss your eighteenth birthday.”
“I’ll be back a full week before my eighteenth birthday, it’s you who’ll still be gone more than likely.”
“You’re breakin‘ our deal, Cass.”
I scowled at him, my stomach churning. “You broke it first by running off to war!”
“So, this is about getting back at me?”
“No!” I snapped, and then took a deep breath. “No, seriously, it’s not. The deal was we would have a private wedding ceremony by the dead tree with Torbig the Troll as officiant when I turn eighteen, right? I’m not eighteen. So, as long as you’re back at some point before I turn nineteen, I will view the deal is intact. Unless of course, you find your forever love and marry her instead. At that point, I will admit that my heart will unequivocally shatter into a million pieces…” I let my sentence trail, hoping my joke would lighten the mood.
Carter laughed. “Fuckin‘ nut.”
I giggled. “Says the bolt.”
This had been a private joke I’d started back before I knew exactly what nuts and bolts were. At the time, he’d laughed hysterically, then explained the sexual connotation I’d inadvertently voiced, but still, the joke had stuck and it had been our thing.
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Chapter 60
“You’re coming back, right?” he pressed.
“Are you?”
“Yeah, Cass, I’m coming back.”
I slipped my hands into my pockets. “Well, so am I.”
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He wrapped his arms around me and drew me close. I pulled my hands from my pockets and hugged him back. I loved him more than I would ever admit out loud, but that was a story for another day. For now, it was time to grow up and figure out how to live my life without my crutch. It was something my mother had urged me to do… figure out how to exist in a world without Carter Quinn, but I’d always brushed her off, thinking one day, I’d have him forever. That he’d see me for something other than his best friend. But when he’d been recruited for the Air Force and jumped at the chance to be a hero, I realized he’d never see me the way I saw him, so I knew I had to let him go.
“I’m coming to the airport,” he said, his voice low with emotion.
I squeezed my eyes shut. “You better.”
“I’ll email you every day that I can and you better do the same.”
I smiled and leaned back to look up at him. “Do not go get all emotional and shit on me.”
“Don’t use that fuckin‘ language. You’re too pretty for it.”
“You’re a dork.” I laughed and shoved at him. “FroYo and a movie? I’ll buy.”
“You’re not payin‘, Cass, but yeah, FroYo and a movie’s good.”
“Do you want to climb back down the tree or use the front door like a regular person?”
We had a huge tree that happened to have a sturdy limb that was like a ladder directly to my room. Carter had snuck in on more than one occasion, mostly when I was mad at him and refused to answer his phone calls. I’d tease him because if he didn’t talk to me at least once a day, he couldn’t seem to function.
“I didn’t know your parents would be gone,” he countered.
I giggled. “Whatever. I personally think you prefer the tree. Of course, it’s the middle of the day, so you ringing the doorbell would have been perfectly acceptable.”
He grinned. “Keep it up, buddy, and there’ll be no movie for you.”
“Oooh, you scare me,” I retorted as I grabbed my keys and followed him out the door.
One week later, I stood with my dad and Carter at the end of the security line, not quite ready to say my final goodbyes as I headed to my next adventure. Daddy was flying to Paris with me and checking everything out before flying home, and Carter had offered to drive us so my mom could say goodbye at home. She was a wreck, so had readily agreed to do her sobbing in private. My sisters on the other hand had a life outside of
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Chapter 60
me and were happy to wave at Carter’s truck as we were driving away.
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I was consumed with the fact that Carter was leaving in two days for his tour with the Air Force, which meant we’d maybe have a day or two to email or Skype, but then nothing was guaranteed.
I had done a really great job of keeping my warring emotions at bay. I was excited to go to Paris. I mean, it was freakin‘ Paris after all, but I knew I’d miss my family. We were tight. Like Carter and his family, only we were sisters, so we fought a little dirtier, but we loved each other and our parents rocked.
But leaving Carter made me sick to my stomach. I didn’t know where he was going or where he’d be stationed… neither did he. The not knowing was the worst and if anything happened to him, I’d be the eighth to know, unless one of his brothers called me before my parents did. I blinked back tears at the thought, saying a silent little prayer to keep him safe.
“You okay?” Carter asked.
I forced a smile and nodded. “Yep.”
“I think this is where we leave you, Carter,” my father said.
Carter nodded and shook his hand. “Have a safe trip, sir.”
My dad smiled and nodded, and I lost it, throwing my arms around Carter’s neck and sobbing against his chest. “Ohmigod, Carter, if you get yourself killed in some Middle Eastern country, I will hurt you.”
He chuckled, hugging me tight. “I’m not so easy to kill, Cass. I’m going to be fine, okay?”
I leaned back and he cupped my face, wiping my tears away with his thumbs. “Please stay safe,” I whispered.
“I will. A bolt must return to his nut after all.”
I rolled my eyes and nodded. “I love you.”
“Love you too, Cass.” He leaned down and gave me a gentle kiss on the lips. Not a romantic one, just one that reminded me he was my best friend and he adored me.
Dad and I walked through the point of no return and as I was putting my shoes back on, Carter waved to me, and I know he waited until he couldn’t see me anymore before leaving. Don’t ask me how I knew. I just did.
AD
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