Lynn was waiting with my mother outside. They both looked up as we left the house. She started to shake a little, but Toya and I both pretended not to see. “Ready to go?” I called.
My mom smiled and rubbed her shoulder. “Lynn wanted to ask a favor.”
I walked over and waited. “Okay…”
Lynn shuffled for a few seconds. “I know that this is just a bandaid And it won’t help me process anything that has happened.” She was stalling and trying to explain herself.
“Just ask.” I tipped my head to the side and waited.
She met my eyes and I saw panic there. “I’m terrified to leave. So much so that my wolf is digging into me. She feels safe here, and we haven’t felt safe since leaving
our pack.”
That was a kick to the stomach e.” I looked
at my mom. “Faked you.”
Lynn shook her head. “No. Amy you didn’t “/
She grabbed my hand “You had things you had to do.”
I nodded. “But I should have kept a better eye on you and what was happening.” I rubbed my thumb over the side of her hand. “I owe you.” She shook her head. “Just tell me what you need. Do you need to stay here? Done. I won’t make you leave.‘
She shook her head more vigorously.
“Then how can I help?” I watched
not that.‘
“>
fight with her words. My mom stepped closer to her and rubbed her back.
“You can do this.” My mom’s words seemed to bolster her.
Lynn met my eyes again, and I still saw the panic, but something else was there. A hidden strength she probably didn’t even know she had. “I want you to command me to not be afraid.”
I reeled back like I was slapped. “What?” My gaze snapped to my moms, but she was focused on Lynn. “Lynn…”
“Before you say no, can you listen to my reasoning first?” She rushed out. I watched her for a second and then nodded.
“Of course.”
She shuddered. She was obviously worried I would have said no before she could try to reason with me. “I’m terrified to leave.” She started. “But I need to leave. I can’t stay here for the rest of my life. I have a pack, a position in that pack, and potentially a second chance out there. But mainly…I need to take back my strength. Derek needs to die, and I need to see it through. I won’t be able to move on without it. He has become my boogyman.” Her face morphed into a mask of hatred. “He doesn’t deserve to have that much power over anyone. Including me. He took a bond that was supposed to be sacred and turned into torture.” She looked lost as her brain forced her back to that place. I squeezed her hand, and I watched her eyes struggle to focus back on me. If you take the fear away, then I can function. I can do my job. I can keep my rank and dignity in our pack. But most of all.” She looked down top the ground. “If you take the fear away, when I see Derek, I won’t be back there in that dark room. He won’t have power over me anymore. And I will be able to kill him.”
“You can kill him now.” Toya tossed out softly. Her support was unwavering.
But Lynn shook her head. “Physically? Yes. I can.” She seemed to gain a bit of strength from that. “Mentally? I don’t know if I am strong enough yet. But we have run out of time.” She lifted her hand. “I’m shaking this hard just thinking about leaving my room for a night. Being back in the pack terrifies me because if they see what I have become, they will shun me.”
“That’s not true.” I whispered to her. “And I think deep down you know that.”
Lynn sighed. “In my heart, I know you are right. Our pack is amazing, but in my mind.” She shook her head. “In my mind, in my wolfs mind, we are trapped. Cornered. And she is willing to kill anyone that comes too close.” She met my eyes.
“You are afraid of yourself.” My words surprised even me, but Lynn nodded.
1/3
Chapter 494
+25 BONUS
“I don’t want to hurt anyone just because they patted my back. Or walked too close at night.” She stepped closer, and I watched a tear trail down her face. “You can remove the command after everything is done, and I swear I will go into seclusion until I am healthy enough to be around the pack safely. But right now, we don’t have an option.”
I looked between Lynn, Toya, and finally my mother. “Mom?”
She looked at Lynn. “While I have raised you to not command a wolf unless necessary. There are always exclusions to the rule.” She lifted a hand and I watched Lynn tense. “Her fear is doing hier more harm than good.” She turned to me, waiting for my
answer.
I swallowed past a lump. “Lynn, I command you to not be afraid.” The words felt like tar, but then her back straightened. The fear in her eyes vanished. And for the first time
a
me…Ly smiled.
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