Chapter 3
After that, we entered a cold war.
Douglas stopped reaching out to me.
I didn’t contact him, either.
The apartment our department had assigned us was already renovated, just waiting for us to move in after the engage-
ment.
I went there alone. The place was spacious, but felt hollow. Every piece of furniture had been chosen together.
I sat on the couch for a long time.
A week later, Douglas finally called. His voice sounded exhausted.
“Maddie, can we talk?”
We met at the new apartment. He’d lost weight and had dark circles under his eyes.
“Maddie, I’m sorry. I haven’t been myself lately,” he began.
“Sarah’s been unstable, emotionally. I’ve had to spend extra time with her.”
I said nothing, waiting for him to go on.
“I know you’re upset. But Maddie, we’ve been together eight years-you know me, don’t you? With Sarah, it’s just duty and guilt. Nothing more.”
“I know,” I said.
He let out a relieved breath. “I knew you’d understand me best.”
He stepped closer, trying to hug me.
I moved away.
“Douglas, I came here today to tell you-I don’t want this apartment.”
He froze. “What do you mean?”
“The place our department gave us-the deed’s in your name since we’re not married yet. I don’t want it anymore.”
“Why? This is our home!”
“I’m afraid one day, Ms. Boyer’s light bulb will burn out again, or her drain will clog, and you’ll decide she needs a
home more than I do.”
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Douglas’s face darkened.
“Madeline, do you have to say things like that? Do you have to jab at me like this?”
“Am I wrong?”
“That’s just a small favor!”
“Running out on our engagement party was a small favor, too? Giving her half your paycheck is just a small favor? Douglas, you have too many ‘small favors.””
He was speechless.
Finally, he took a deep breath. “Fine, Madeline. If that’s what you think, I’ll prove it.”
He stared at me, enunciating every word. “This week, I’ll have Sarah move in. She’ll stay in the guest room.”
For a moment, my mind went blank.
“What did you say?”
“I said, I’ll have Sarah move in!” His voice rose, as if trying to convince me-or maybe himself.
“She’s living alone, and I’m worried! She’d always getting into trouble! If she’s here, right under our noses, I can keep an eye on her-and you can stop worrying, too! Is that enough?”
I looked at him like he was a stranger.
“Douglas, you’re out of your mind!”
“I’m not crazy! I’m perfectly clear-headed! I can’t let Gilbert’s widow be homeless!” He emphasized every word.
Suddenly, a bone-deep exhaustion washed over me.
“Fine,” I said. “Let her move in.”
Douglas clearly hadn’t expected me to agree so easily. He was stunned.
I took the keys out of my purse and set them on the coffee table.
“These are yours.”
“From now on, this is your home-with your comrade’s widow.”
“I wish you both a happy life.”
I stood up and walked out of the place I’d once looked forward to calling home.
As I closed the door behind me, I thought I heard something shatter inside.
At last, my tears fell.
Eight years.
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Just like that, it was over.
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