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thought Asters overbearing presence was bad, but the wooing began
subh First came the gifts of wildflowers, then a carved wooden wolf, but
none of those impressed me
I was a woman scored, and everything he did temporarily made my heart flutter, but I still couldn’t find him genuine.
He tried talking to me softly, bringing me meals himself, even making my favorite tea. His eyes burned with something desperate when he looked at me. He reached for my hand, brushed my hair aside, tried to break down the
walls I’d built.
But I stayed cold. Each gift, each kind word, only made me angrier. He was chasing the ghost of the girl who had once loved him, a girl who no longer
existed.
I ignored his efforts. I kept my answers short, my face blank.
His frustration grew. I saw it in the way his jaw clenched, the way his eyes darkened. But he didn’t stop.
One night, after dinner, he cornered me in the hallway. His scent, pine and power, surrounded me. He put his hand on the wall beside my head, trapping me without touching me.
“Faith,” he said with a rough voice. I could feel his wolf battling to take
control. “What do I have to do to make you look at me again?”
I met his eyes, letting him see the coldness inside me.
“Give me my freedom.”
“You have freedom,” he argued. “Everything you need is here.”
14
I shook my head.
No, it’s not.” My voice was flat. “And I need to tell you something. I don’t love you anymore, Astor. Whatever we had, it’s gone. You killed it. Let me go.”
He really did.
His face changed to hurt, disbelief, then anger. A slow, dangerous smile curled his lips.
“You don’t mean that,” he said, voice cold. “You’re angry, but you just admitted that you loved me, which means that you still do, and I will prove it to you. Every day. Until you forgive me.”
He refused to believe me.
And so, I remained trapped in a beautiful cage, surrounded by a pack that pretended to accept me and an Alpha who refused to let me go.
Inside, I was already gone.
The pack members, who had ignored or mocked me before, were suddenly acting differently. They smiled too much. Their voices were too sweet. I wasn’t stupid. I could tell it was all an act.
They suddenly wanted to play nice because they figured their alpha wanted to keep me around instead of their favorite, but it pissed me off more instead of making me happy.
I was the second choice. They suddenly wanted to kiss ass because Alice
was not here.
The girl who would always know him in ways that I never will, and it stung.
I was starting to lose myself in between all of this, and maybe I lost myself a very long time ago. In fact, I don’t think I even got the chance to know who I was before all of this.
I have no one to turn to except Alpha Sander–Astor’s father. Unlike his son, Sander was wise and fair. Perhaps he could persuade Astor to see reason.
Maybe he could help me.
It’s hard for me to find him. Since he retired, he always does whatever he wants. And he always liked to be alone.
I found Sander in his study, surrounded by old books, and he looked up as I
entered, his silver eyes calm.
“Faith,” he said, nodding slightly.
I think the Dynamics of our relationship changed the day I came back because I said some things to him that he obviously there in appreciate even
though they were true.
I swallowed hard, my throat tight with fear.
“Alpha Sander, I need your help. I can’t stay here like this. Astor’s keeping me against my will I need to find my father and I need to leave.” I said to him because he seemed very surprised when I mentioned my father, unlike his
mate.
He gestured for me to sit. I did, my hands shaking.
“What’s going on with your, Faith? I thought you were happy.” He said, his
voice steady.
I don’t know what gave him the indication that I was ever happy because even a fool could see how much I was drowning.
“Why can’t any of you understand that it is my choice who I want to marry. I gave Astor and our relationship an honest chance, and it didn’t work out, so why are you constantly making me suffer like I’m the only one responsible for
this?” I asked.
“My son is arrogant, convinced of his own infallibility. He dismisses all
Chapter 30
counsel but mine–a grave error for any Alpha. I believe you are the one who
can change him.” Sander sighed. “Astor oves you, Faith. He obviously did something to make you feel like this, but I’m sure you guys can talk about it. That’s no reason to want to leave.”
I thought he cared, but he is just like the rest.
“But it’s not what I want!” My voice rose in frustration.
“Astor’s stubborn,” Sander admitted. “He’s made up his mind. I won’t go against him because he is now the alpha of this pack, but you wouldn’t know that because you missed the ceremony. Why can’t you give him another chance, Faith?”
My hope died then because a part of me was starting to warm up to the attention Astor was showering on me. I craved it more than anything in the world because it’s one thing he kept away from me despite being always near, and now that we had so much distance between us, he was showering me with all of his attention.
I pretended not to notice, I pretended not to smile or not to be touched by everything that he did, but I was softening up, and I hate it because it doesn’t take away what they did.
How can I forgive him for running into her arms? Why Alice of all people? Why did she have to be the one that everybody in my life chose?
cphakathi28
#vote#
